Cookie Policy 🍪

Effective Date: March 15, 2025

1. Introduction

Welcome to The Maple Curtain! This website uses cookies—not the delicious kind, unfortunately, but the tiny data files that help our site function properly. By continuing to browse our site, you agree to the use of these digital crumbs.

If you’re not okay with that, you can disable cookies in your browser settings—but be warned, it may make things look weird, like watching American news and expecting logic.

2. What Are Cookies?

Cookies are small text files stored on your device when you visit a website. They help websites remember things like:
✔️ If you’ve been here before (so we don’t have to reintroduce ourselves every time)
✔️ What content you engage with (to improve your Maple Curtain experience)
✔️ Basic analytics (so we know whether anyone is actually reading this)

We do not use cookies to:
🚫 Track you in a creepy way
🚫 Sell your data to shady third parties
🚫 Control the outcome of a Leafs playoff series (we wish we had that power)

3. Types of Cookies We Use

We keep it simple—our cookies fall into these categories:

🛠 Essential Cookies – These keep the website running smoothly. If you disable them, things might break, like a Tim Hortons espresso machine at 6 AM.

📊 Analytics Cookies – These help us understand what content you enjoy (or hate) so we can write more of it (or completely ignore the data).

📱 Social Media Cookies – These enable interactions with social media platforms, so you can share our nonsense with your friends and regret it later.

🍁 Canadian Cookies – Okay, not real cookies, but if we could send you digital Timbits, we would.

4. Managing Your Cookies

If you want to control or delete cookies, you can do so through your browser settings. Every browser has a different method, but here’s the general process:

1. Go to your browser settings.
2. Look for “Privacy” or “Cookies.”
3. Delete or disable cookies.
4. Immediately regret this when half the internet stops working.

For more detailed instructions, visit your browser’s support page.

5. Third-Party Cookies

Some cookies on our site may come from third-party services, like:

• Google Analytics (so we know if people are actually reading this)
• Social media platforms (for when you share our questionable content)
• Email/newsletter services (so we can send you updates you may or may not open)

These third parties have their own cookie policies, so if you have concerns, complain to them, not us.

6. Changes to This Policy

We might update this Cookie Policy from time to time. If we do, we’ll:
✔️ Update this page
✔️ Post something sarcastic about it on social media
✔️ Pretend we’ve always had it this way

7. Contact Us

If you have questions about this Cookie Policy (or just want to vent about your own internet frustrations), you can reach us at:
📧 sorry@themaplecurtain.com